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Unfinished: The Hangover of Resolutions, Episode 6


Hey housewives. Come on in. You know, the dirty dishes are still in the sink, and the laundry is still in the basket, pop your air pods and make yourself at home here. I'm Tori. I'm Tracy, and we are your unlikely housewives stepping out in faith and believing that God calls me unlikely. We are here to show you the appreciation and validation you deserve, lead you to authentic relationships and release you from believing the cultural lies to restore your faith and wellness. Pull up those high waisted yoga pants, that in your top knot and reheat your coffee for the third time today. Turn up the volume. And let's go.


Hey, housewives, hey, we're so glad you are here. We cannot believe it the last show of the year. And we wanted to say first of all, if you haven't listened to the detox download episode yet, pause this episode, go back and listen to that one. First. You're not gonna want to miss it. But then again, we can't tell you what to do. So you can keep listening to this one if you want. And then go back and listen to that one later. And then listen to this one again, because that would be great. Not that you have anything better to do, mom. No, but you know what? This could be worth a second. Listen, that's true. I mean, we haven't recorded it fully yet. But I believe in it. That's, that's good that you have that much belief in us? Well, let's talk about what is going to be on everybody's lips in the next like five days is New Year's resolutions. Okay, what resolution did you make for 2021?


I don't know. I don't remember. Do you remember? No, I have no idea. Are you a resolution person? Or are you like a word person?


I'm pretty sure I picked a word. I used to pick a word. But then I kind of gave up on that because it didn't do it past like February. But my thing too is with a word. What do you do with the word? I mean? It's almost like there's no, you reflect on it, maybe pray through it really tried to implement it. I mean, I did. So maybe like 2017 because we moved in 2016. My word was simplify. Because I needed to like declutter indie junk. So we simplify it in the winter months. And I did that. And I did the cleaning. And you


wrap that resolution, right by Mark. Yep. Simplified anything else the rest of that year? Knowing your family schedule, probably. So I don't really know. I mean, then when you're I think I did. Intentional. And then it was,


and you were intentionally forgetting that one now. Totally. I don't get it. I don't know why.


I think when you're I did fearless. But fear less. Oh, good. And so that one was one, but I don't recall anything impactful with the word. Right, that specifically I was reaching out for, I think I think it's good intentions with the word resolutions. I mean, what are the studies show that if you most of us are done by the mid February anyway, right? I mean, you can see that in every single gym. Yeah, by Valentine's Day, people have pieced out I think with some of the resolutions. They were not written, like written down or really thought through it was uh, why don't I try this? There wasn't enough effort behind it. Probably to start for it to even that's true. Probably not enough. Want. Yeah. And desire. Yeah. And I think with our topic, people that I mean, that rock them that totally make changes and do all the things and they're Oh, yeah, all about it. We're here to tell you if they work for you. Congratulations. Like we read a book. Yeah. Don't even bother reading a book. Make it an audiobook. Yeah, we'll listen. Yeah, it's a lot easier for us to listen. Yeah, no, we are, I think an agreement and that's where this kind of title came from. Unfinished the hangover of resolutions being that they just keep reappearing the next year. They're still there. Oh, yeah. Still want to get healthier. So want to work out more. I still want to read those books. I still want to work on this. And they just kind of just keep reappearing. They do. They do. And I think part of that is we all need to realize too, is if we woke up this morning, God's not done with us. Yeah. So that's the good news. And also the bad news. Your job is not done. Yes. I feel really bad for people like Betty White. I mean, what do you just oh my god. Okay, God, let me tap out. I am. So Golden Girls. I know. Who would you be if you were a golden girl? I didn't know. Oh, gosh, this is one of those moments right? My age. A little bit older than you. Dang it. Do you remember Designing Women though? Oh, yes, I do. Okay, Designing Women was I like Oh, I love it. Okay, Blanche. I was probably. I probably used to work. She's extra. Exactly. Okay. case you were wondering, we know which golden girl I was. Yes. Were you? Well, I probably. I'm always the mom everywhere. Like, that's true. So I don't I don't want to say that. I'm like the crusty old grandma. I can't remember her name, but it's normally more like Dorothy. Dorothy. What was it? Who was Dorothy's mom? What was her name? I don't remember people yelling at the podcast right now. I noticed that. Yeah. Because she always said the that might also have been me doing it. That's gonna make me mad. Your show notes. Later. Oh, so good. All right. So when we post this on our Instagram, we want to confuse the heck out. We want you to write down in the comments on the Instagram post. Which golden girl were you? Or which one was your favorite? Yes. So then where are you now? Yeah, we're looking at the comments. Queen. Blanche, Dorothy. All the things. We're talking about resolutions out there. I know we are. Well, we're getting back. All right. But we're talking about this being on journey together. You know, Tracy and I here. This is not a fixed on issue per episode kind of thing that's done. We're clearly obviously we give you a lot of encouragement about showing you how we have not done resolutions. Have you successfully done anything like started something in the beginning of the year and stuck with it? Yeah, I think I probably have been more intentional. Like, a couple years ago, I actually started intermittent fasting. And I've actually stuck with that. And I think that was something that fit my schedule. It fit, like my health goals. And it was something that I could control. I think a lot of those things, the resolutions that I set, I don't do a good job, like helping them be measurable and working with my current lifestyle. That's why I fall short. Well, I think it's like the people that want to go to the gym and say, Okay, I'm going to go to the gym five days a week. And then by the third day, you're like, No, yeah. And that's where, for me, I think I go all or nothing, quite often. That's me as well. And so if I can't do it all, then I don't want to do it. Yeah. And I think that's where this whole, like I actually had a friend when we launched our first episodes, she was like, I just love that you just go for it. I'm like, that's such a great compliment. But if I'm gonna go for it, like I've done the prep I'm


planning had, she had not talked to you for the last six months. That's actually true. No idea was like, Hey, let's record an episode. But you for you, you also just go for it. And you're ready. And I think yeah, how this how we got here was an unfinished resolution. But we just didn't know what it was. Like we knew when we started this year, we wanted to grow and do something differently. We had no idea was going to be this podcast. I mean, we had no idea there's going to be something together. Also true. God absolutely used us in our stories in our sauna sessions to get here. Yeah, closed sauna sessions. So really, at the beginning of last year, I was in a really big funk. Like I felt stuck my business, we had done incredible things the prior year. And then it was just like, this wall, almost. And so I didn't know where I was. And I had gotten to the point where I was identifying myself and taking my identity as my business. Yeah, what I was doing in that that's often we I mean, so many people do that, right? Just check that box. And we'll do an episode on that later. Right? Or, but so I was trying to figure out where who I was, and all of that as things because when you're not in that work momentum, and you're just kind of I mean, the the saying goes, if you're not moving forward, you're going backwards. And it was very, absolutely 100% true in that business. But I just didn't know where where I was. And so God just use that funk of A, who am I what am I doing? Is this where I'm supposed to be kind of thing. And then you were using a life coach at the time. And we you know, the sauna sessions talking back and forth. And I knew God had used me in a circumstance for pitbulls. Yeah, and to speak out for pitbulls. And that was April, May, this year. And so I was like this, this is where I want to be. I want to be on that. Like and God just kind of like it was an introduction. Yeah, almost for me. And so then that gave me permission to explore the other side of Okay. When I do say truth, and I'm sharing that with others. How am I going to do that? Yeah, and I same similar situation with me. I mean, I'd started co leading a Bible study and I actually had someone I just, you know, kind of say like, You are so good with your words in speaking truth and love in just many situations. And I think that's so funny because we're our worst critic. And I feel like I always overthink everything that I'm going to say. But that was one of the best things that she gave me to open my heart and mind to it. And then everywhere I looked, I read the Bible, I was praying, like God was like, speak, use your voice, speak, use your voice, like those were the things he was saying. And I'm like, that's kind of how this came about. So back to our resolutions. I mean, really, at the beginning of the year, I didn't set any this year. Like, I was like, You know what, last year was a, whatever year this year is just going to be different. And I'm just going to do my best to figure myself out because I knew I wanted to grow. I knew I wanted to change in just forward progress. But I didn't know how. And so I did the work in the beginning. And I would say I was uncovering things. And really, really just peeling back the layers of the unfinished the hangover of 2020, I was peeling back those layers for months. And we didn't even start talking about this till the summer. So I would say I didn't have any vision of even where I would go for the end of this year, which is great. Right? To know that we don't have to decide everything January one, yes. And to give ourselves permission to go with the flow. If your start the beginning of the year in a funk and the year in a funk, whatever, wherever you're at doesn't mean that it's forever, right? It means that God can use that to bring you to a new spot, but also like, give yourself grace and permission to not have it all figured out. January one and just go okay, God, I


you can speak to me on July 1. Yeah, I can still do whatever you've called me to do. And that space. Yeah, that's why I mean, we were just talking about this. The Unfinished resolution versus the New Year's resolution like in hangover obviously came about because friends, I don't know how you feel on January 1. Some may have a hangover. Yeah. So me better than others, by 2021 doesn't just mean doesn't wash away, you don't wake up January 1, with a clean slate fresh start, like the hangover of what happened in December is still there in January, what's going on in your life still lingers. So when we want to make these resolutions, which we want to encourage you guys to because really, that sets you up for growth and success. And we actually encourage this, but we want you to be intentional of going okay, what is unfinished in 2021? Like, and you can decide what is unfinished in 2021 that I either want to continue, and this goes back to the detox download episode. And you can either say Nope, we're gonna leave that. We're gonna let that go. Like Elsa says, or you know what, that is something that I want to finish. Yeah. And or like, I want to continue that or start again, it's okay to start again, you can start the same process. You only fail when you quit. Yeah, I mean, let's talk about health journeys. Guys, every health journey restarts in January, whether three every year, let's January, let's refocus, you know, we get through the holidays. Let's do it again in January, you know, there's a lot of things that you're not thinking about in January, maybe it's your job, maybe it is, I don't know, your vacations, just you're planning, you're not thinking about it. January one, you know, there's some things you do and some things you don't. But we want you to realize, and just take that guilt or whatever that's carrying over into the new year as well. I didn't do a good last year. So why would I this year, and just give yourself that grace, and realize we're about to celebrate your two of a anniversary of a pandemic? Do we want to stay here? No, we're not here we are moving forward. Things are, you know, we do have the opportunity to continue to improve and grow and start new things and chase those dreams. But if you're holding on to something, you've got to let it go. Absolutely. In what circumstances are you holding on to? Because circumstances are just that and so many times we hold on to something to use it as an excuse instead of a reason to move forward? Yeah, I mean, as a mom, I can use my kids for every excuse in the book. I feel like that that's we had kids for two reasons. One to use them as an excuse and then to to embarrass the crap out of them. Yes, we are on board with the embarrassment. Yeah, uh huh. Yeah. So that's the purpose of children if you if you were unaware, parenting tip for today. Well, and I wanted to quote my favorite Les Brown, because this is something that when I was watching one of his lives this summer, and he quoted he says Your past is not your prison. And we want you to realize that Tony, Tony is not your prison. 2021 is not your prison. I mean, maybe it's 1985 I don't know. But something that you're holding on to that you have experienced your circumstance does not know Need to hold you back from where you want to go? It's not a prison, nor does it define, you know, it may actually be Have you ever heard that your testimony can't be the greatest testimony without the test. The test is part of the testimony, like your story, what you've walked through whether in your marriage, going through a divorce, having a baby, a loss of something critical that you have walked through the circumstance that was extremely difficult, or just an obstacle that you haven't been able to overcome. We are here to remind you through less, that it's not your past is not your prison, you don't have to stay there. And I just, I don't know, I feel like that when we go into 2022. We want you guys to be going okay, what is unfinished in my past, that I need to heal, or recoup from or revisit, like, it's a personal thing. I think it's an emotional thing that we just get stuck on something and then we just wallow in it. 110% Yeah. And it's easy to do one, we think we're the only ones that experienced it. You know, and we think that nobody knows exactly how I'm feeling. Nobody knows what this is. And thanks to human experience, there is almost certainly somebody that has dealt with, to some degree, what you have dealt with. Yeah. I mean, the human experience varies per person. Yeah, mostly. But there's a marriage issue. There's people out there that have had the same marriage issue. Yep. And,


and it doesn't go away in January. It's not right. And maybe some people aren't making you know, New Year's resolutions about their marriage, or encourage you to, you know, like, set some goals of like, hey, let's regularly have a date night or be more intentional. But that's the hangover. That's what continues in the new year. And we're not talking some self care hair for next year. We're talking about some soul care. Like, we want you to start 2021 Like my two Yeah, yeah. Thanks. Yeah, sorry. 22. Yep, yep, did that in 2022, with some just reflection and look at what is unfinished. Because we truly believe just from our experience, and where we are right now, this was the first year that we walked into this year without goals and without intentions, and going what is unfinished? What are we going to do and look where God is brought us? Right? This was not started. And it's unfinished, because we're going to have a heck of a year next year. Yes, we are. But I think we opened our hands and we let go of what was holding us back last year, what was really just giving us that mental block, and staying stuck, where we were, in certain situations, us growing and us giving things to God and just being obedient and listening to him has improved so much in our life, not just because of the podcast like, but because we have been so intentional with what we are going to do for him. And that brought us so much peace. And maybe it's not something that was unfinished in 2021. For you, maybe it's something that's unfinished, in that maybe you didn't get to finish college, for whatever reason, right? I actually know somebody that is graduating, she was determined, like she didn't finish college. And she's like, I'm going back. And I'm going to do that. And it was important for her and her college career did not look like how she envisioned it did not end like she had planned whatsoever. But she was like, this matters to me, you know, and she may have had a however many years break between starting and finishing. But she did it. And that is something that she was dead set on. And she made it happen. Right. So that's also something to look at, like what were you dreaming of? What did you want to see happen? Did you want to become a vet, when you're in college, but something took you out of that and you know, you had to go help a family member, you know, take care of the family business or you know, something or you had kids and then theives pause for a second we had kids that stops a lot of people in their tracks. You know, in the change of you know, having kids having a newborn than having a toddler and then having teens like every season. There's always a reason. There's a season that stops you the excuses of the kids like oh, maybe it'll get better when they're back in school full time or Oh, it's going to be well then they're going to be teenagers and they're going to be in high school like there's always a reason guys that we are going to use our kids as an excuse for what we're not doing. But the one thing that I have learned and again, I am a work in progress. We are working progress. We did not have this figured out but our kids are celebrating with us what we're doing. Yeah, that was really neat on let me finish my thought on the bad thing. Oh, my bad. Interrupting links. Okay, so maybe you want to be a bet and then you had kids and there's like, Okay, this does not make sense to go and do the school and all the things right or just start a vet practice whatever. I don't know all the details of that. But maybe now that you're older your kids are older life is in a different position, you're in a different position. You're like, Wow, gosh, I really am not going to ever go back to that school like that dream is off. Well, what if it looks different? Yeah. What if it looks different? What if it starts with you wanted to take care of animals? What if that just starts with you volunteering at a shelter? What if that just starts with that tech school? Like, being a technician? Or it doesn't have to be the same? It can modify, it can change? Uh huh. Absolutely. And that's almost the harder part, right? Because there's part of you that wants to grieve your initial dream, your initial goal didn't come to fruition, you're like, you're letting that die, essentially. But if you let that go to a certain extent, and then go okay, but that's still in my desire. I still want to do that. How do I do that? The base of that was caring and loving animals. How do I do that now, start volunteering at a shelter. And then maybe it comes to you, you know, maybe


at that point, you meet somebody, you meet the vet there, who needs help, who needs help, and needs an intern who whatever it is, but if you open your self up to that, and you're more flexible, and your eyes are more open to that, you're not just shutting everything out, because it didn't fit the box you wanted it to fit in. But like you were saying, we use our kids as an excuse and their seasons, we'd say, well, I have kids at home now, you know, to under three and I can't do anything, blah, blah, blah. And then all of a sudden, it's like, well, now I have middle schoolers, and they need me more than ever now. You know, he's such a tough age. And then all of a sudden, Matt is there in high school? I, I'm not there yet. And then they're in high school, and we think, Oh, good. I'll have more time because they have a car they have more freedom. But then that just requires more things for mom and dad to do like, you know, and the responsibilities of not all that so we can use our kids and forever. Yeah, well and I think just letting them I've been you know a stay at home mom but working for the last six years. Obviously starting this they've seen this venture go from what is a podcast, mommy to this and celebrating with us. Hey, Sue, tell them about the celebrations for what we are we the week, we launched we got together for dinner, both of our family trailer trailer was just the trailer. Yes. And we were just so excited that we had one thing out there. And obviously, we have a Facebook portal in our kitchen. And my husband was like, Okay, let's see if this really works. Because we knew we were on Apple podcast by then. And no, it wasn't even Apple. It was Spotify. It was no it was audible like the Amazon audible. You're right Amazon music thing. Yeah. So when we first got picked up, our podcast was picked up. And so he said, Hey, Alexa, play unlikely housewives. And hopefully you're not listening on this or all your doors devices just went off. But they said, Hey, Alexa play like unlikely housewives and Yoko. And it started in like, our kids were like, what? And then we said, hey, how's


it famous like the kids were like, Oh, my God, Alexa, know who you are.


They've seen this get to hear. And that was a huge celebration for us. And really fun. Yeah. And I just I want to encourage you to, you know, be open and honest with your kids of where you want to go and what you want to do. Let them be a part of it. That's been one of my greatest joys and, you know, my husband, owning a new business now that kids have been helping him with that with this becomes something that the one you're teaching them something, you know, entrepreneurial spirit and working hard, but you're also showing them that, hey, when we have those late nights, or we're working, or we're doing things and you're setting goals, they get to see those goals come to fruition and celebrate those victories together. Yeah, it's really fun to see and to like having my my girls go, Okay, I'm going to tell my teacher to listen to unlikely or the oh, is this your sticker? Can I put this on my water bottle? All my friends? I'm like, Well, this is alright. Yes, my fine. Yeah. But I mean, yeah, you're our kids are not the market for this yet. So we want to just encourage you guys to really consider what is your unfinished business, your unfinished resolution, God's not done with you. Every morning you wake up is a new day, a new opportunity for you to just pray and listen and tap into what you feel you're being called to do. So our encouragement and our call to action, just we want you guys to consider that. Ask yourself that share with us on social media. We want to know that you are looking at this of yes, this is unfinished. What am I going to do next year? It's not with a clean slate the Fresh Start the brand new year's resolution. It's the what's unfinished. How am I going to grow from this? Well, we are going to wrap it up but we just made it to six episodes, and it's hard to believe it really is. Wow, you had more stuff to talk about. We have a lot more stuff to talk about. And while we couldn't be more excited where we're headed Obviously heading into 2022. With this podcast, we want to take just a moment and say thank you so much for helping us launch here at the end of the year in the midst of a busy season for everybody, right? Can we just say that we launched this in the middle of the holiday craziest season? Like, this is a true testament to do it messy? Yeah, just do it when you're called to do it, just do it. Yes. I feel like at some point I'm I was going to be recording a podcast while grabbing Christmas presents. Yeah, just like okay, let's multitask. I can talk and rap at the same time. That wrapping paper won't be annoying it all right, or that's scotch tape feel that sound that was that scotch tape, scotch tape. More sound effects coming out in 2020 do but we would love if you have enjoyed these six episodes. We would love for you to take a brief second and write a review on Apple podcasts and share this podcast to your social medias. If we've made you laugh at all. Or if you want to just share this we would so appreciate it because our hearts are really for this and we're so incredibly thankful for this platform. Yeah, the support has been incredible. So we really appreciate it and as you go into this next year, we just pray that you guys continue to step out into your unlikeliness and into who God called you to be. Have a great day housewives thanks housewives. Whether we made you laugh or cry today, we pray you feel appreciated, older and braver than yesterday. stronger and more faithful for tomorrow, but living in who you were made to be today. Join our online community on Facebook, find our link in the show notes. Be sure to review and subscribe on Apple podcasts or wherever you enjoy listening. Until next time, housewives we give you permission to walk confidently freely be intentional in your slippers or still let us

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